LADIES, PLEASE!

Some see it as a positive result of third-wave feminism, while others think it is just another example of the seemingly unquenchable thirst we have for public displays of brutish manners and train-wreck spectacle. WHATEVAH!, as the bad girls say. There is no doubt that the four-wheeled, all-female, rough-and-tumble sport known as Roller Derby is back.

Grassroots-organized regional teams are battling it out on tracks both banked and flat all over the world. A new campy, DIY feminine sensibility has emerged, and you are more likely to see the ladies in mini skirts and glittery tights than the unflattering and often masculine uniforms of former days.

Beginning as a simple endurance race on wheels, roller derby has evolved by happy accident and shrewd promotion to the organized mayhem its fans love. It was Leo Seltzer, a failed Hollywood publicist in cahoots with writer Damon Runyon, who in the ’30s modified skating races by emphasizing physical contact and teamwork which resulted in the sport enjoying a resurgence of popularity today. So much so that it has passed the acid test of importance to popular culture… they’ve made a movie about it. “Whip It,” directed by former naughty girl Drew Barrymore, tells the story of a beauty pageant drop-out who joins a roller derby team and finds independence and, wonder of wonders, true love.

But it is those good old days - when rival queens of the oval track, “Blonde Bomber” and “Banana-Nose,” or Joan Weston and Ann Calvello, respectively, elbowed each other to fame and fortune - that a new generation of punk-hip young ladies are sardonically taking inspiration from today. Contemporary fans can watch Brandi Iron, Broadzilla and Janis Choplin block, jam and pivot in such festive matches as Season’s Beatings, Spanksgiving and Cinco de May-hem.

And although teams almost always leave the track with a concussion or two and as rough as it looks, the only fatalities associated with the game occurred way back in 1937 when the bus carrying a team and crew blew a tire, rolled over and caught fire, killing 19.

So if a human demolition derby played by savvy, witty, athletic young women in quasi-ironic post-feminist attire is what you’ve always longed to attend, watch for a match coming soon to an arena near you. Trust us, it’s as fun as it sounds. In the meantime, we have clips of the athletes in question - in brutally crisp High Definition - here.